Maddox tribute/My cock is massive

This being my first real post I thought i’d start with some random shit. I am a huge fan of Maddox (http://maddox.xmission.com) his writing is brilliant, anyways to the point I was doing my english creative writing coursework and well I got bored and wrote this:

Side notes:

  • This is merely a tribute to maddox’s writing, the content is 100% original
  • This writing is mostly fictional it is VERY loosely based on reality
  • This is extremely long, its hilarious but if you have a short attention span I’m warning you now

My COCK is massive

I was walking down the road a while ago when a women stepped on my DICK, it was at this point I realised that most people’s wouldn’t be trailing a large length behind them; it was now obvious that my COCK is massive so massive in fact that it can only be written in capital letters. Obviously I forgave the women as I was screwing her within minutes; it was easy to convince her to ride the giant BEAST as she was probably impressed by my super impressive SEX SOLDIER. I like having this giant MEAT SLAB in between my legs, I like the way I can stand on a beach in England and be the only guy there screwing a chick in France. There are however a few problems with it, for example last time I had a wank I knocked a satellite out of orbit and of course I hit it by accident (since my japs eye is the only part of me that’s high enough to see into space) but the chinese government is still charging me £300,000 for the damages. I bet they only charged me because I ruined an opportunity for them to perv on a women who’s tits were as big as my balls (which of course are huge) speaking of my balls it’s worth mentioning that if I rest my epic WANG on my meaty sperm sack and use lube I can effectively create the worlds largest slide. That’s what’s so great about my SHLONG it had many uses, it almost made me a professional footballer as I could use my KNOB to save the shots but apparently the public didn’t want to see such ‘indecency’ so here’s a message for those bastard football managers, “your entire team can go sit on my dick (and of course they would all fit)”. I remember when I used to play golf; I would use my CLUB as the golf club ‘THWACK’ 500 yard drive bitch! unfortunately it was extremely annoying to have to climb a ladder every time I wanted to take a shot so in the end I just quit. Once a boxer challenged how tough my PRICK was. Then I got an erection and trust me it was the best 1-hit KO you’ll ever see. That happened to a girl once she was trying to give me a blow job and as soon as she undid my flies she immediately knocked herself out as well as the 3000 other women in the queue. I guess that’s what’s so great about my LOVE MUSCLE it is indeed great, it’s size alone is enough to make the empire state building feel like an insecure midget. Of course being so immense my MANHOOD is extremely hard to control; I once tried to cock slap a man, BAM knocked the bitch out cold – but I also took out most of Italy by accident. It’s hard to believe that I house such an immense SUPER SAUSAGE in my pants, it may look normal size but my TROUSER SNAKE is held in by a super-tough custom designed pair of boxers made out of penultimatium (the only metal strong enough to hold my MEAT and two veg). Nobody can challenge my CROTCH ROCKET and if you feel like pissing me off you should always remember that I can cock slap both you and your entire family to the moon in one fell swoop.

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1 comment so far

  1. online stock trading advice on

    what a great site and informative posts, I will add a backlink and bookmark your site. Keep up the good work!

    I’m Out! 🙂


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